rojak.

whoa! internet explorer at uni is more hi-tech than mine at home! it looks better and instead of opening a gazillion windows, it lets you open a gazillion tabs... in one window. mine's still old fashioned :(

anyway, i met the Lord Mayor of Adelaide (Michael Harbison) last night. which i thought was pretty cool. I've never been to a reception like that before. got to dress nice, sip wine and take finger food from waitresses walking around with large trays... :) just like in the movies. haha. and there was a professional photographer who took pictures of us with the mayor and we got a copy of that immediately. the reception was only about an hour long. talk about efficient! and it wasnt just a copy of the picture. it came in a black card with a note from the mayor. it was nice.
then we walked to chinatown for dinner. in high heels and dresses and it was cold. and my feet hurt. so thankfully my friend drove us home later after walking halfway... (back to her car)

I think god thinks theres too many people in this world. So he's been taking away lots of people in the past month. My condolences to e and m who have lost someone recently.

is my mood that obvious to figure out? maybe just today... we all have our down times. i think im not used to doing so many things in such little time. i'm a little overwhelmed. nice short break today. back to studying a bit. and then party starts tomorrow night again :)

stats assignment... its a bit strange. i hope he's not so particular with our answers. I somehow always manage to miss out little details which add up and cost quite a few marks. like in the calculus assignments last sem. its not that i dont now how to do stuff. i just write as little as possible for my answers. i dont know why, i just do. so i shouldnt this time i think. stats seem to require lots of jabbering. seriously. my lecture notes make no sense whatsoever cuz he tends to write so much just to explain something simple.

k. back to work.

outlet... dont know if you make any sense out of it. but.. whatever.

If my friend has a problem, i would love it if i'm the first person they turn to for comfort. Rant, complain, spew out everything. But(/and?) in response, isnt it only right to have some feeling towards what that person has just said? isnt it normal that you respond to what they have to say? if it is a 'problem' i highly doubt that it will be positive. And to be all happy-go-lucky about what that person has just told you isn't normal. At least that is what i believe. I believe it's not possible to find someone who you can tell all your problems to without that person feeling troubled. What's the point of talking to them about it if you don't want to share that feeling? Just because i respond negatively to what you have to say doesn't mean i dont want to hear anything about it. I appreciate it when my friends come to me to discuss problems. It shows that they trust me and appreciate me back as a friend. So yes, maybe sometimes i do complain about it. But all of us need an outlet. Best friend or not we all get frustrated by some things sometimes.
Just know that even though sometimes i get irritated and frustrated by some things you do or say, i love and appreciate my friends, and i never mean to do any harm. I can be quite blunt sometimes, and i apologise.

Life Is Good. (with pictures at the end...)

I hope this is the turning point of what has been a rather depressing start of studies in Adelaide. I had expectations before I got here. Many expectations. maybe too many. It hasn't been complete hell, but it could have been better.
Today proved to me that if i actually made an effort to get involved, things do happen. But sacrifices need to be made. Studying my butt off at uni every night this week hopefully paid off. The chem test today went better than i expected. That is, if what i thought was the correct answer is really the correct answer. At uni, the problem is, you never really know whether what you're doing is really correct until you get it marked. and you don't get many things marked... unless it really counts. and by then its a bit too late. My first test was crap. So i freaked out and studied for this one :)

Anyway... the past 2 weeks have been physically and emotionally a rollercoaster... Just the thing about meeting new people and liking some people and not liking some people and some people having problems with other people which causes problems for other people.... yes i just said people like 7 times... but its the root of all problems right?? and then thers lots of other problems and things happening... and your brain can only work up to a certain capacity before its completely saturated and you cant think, cant concentrate and you turn a bit cranky. and ultimately- a bit depressed.

BUT its finally the holidays and today has been a pretty good day even though it involved a test, and a 2 hour bio leture at 4-6 in the evening.

I'm now MySA's new Vice President along with Ben. New President is Alwyn, the 3 Event Coordinators are none other than Margaret, conie and yinlu- somehow all of us from the merdeka performance... Adrian changed position from treasurer to secretary, treasurer is now someone called... i dont remember his name (yes im doing very well as VP... ><), Desmond is Welfare officer, Joa wenn is publicity officer (i think thats what those positions are) and i need help in filling out the other positions... haha. i totally suck.but thats cuz we havent had a meeting yet! so i will be all sorted as soon as we meet up. :) SO fingers crossed, things will be good the rest of this semester, and for the rest of my studies in adelaide. I'll have a lot more work to do and need to seriously work on time management, but if a 3rd year pharmacy student can be president and make everything work, why cant i? :)

And just for fun since i have the time... some random pictures from my phone...

Our work of art on the whiteboard during one of the dance rehearsals- before other people arrived:
The artists, Margaret, Conie, ME. :)
Sunset from outside my apartment...
I was studying! :P
Fried fish. yummy. chef? -me. muahaha!
THe sign at the bus stop- where my brother and I waited 15 mins for a bus. We live 1 bus stop away- 10 mins walk.
For those who still hasnt seen my lecture hall, although i love it so much i think ive posted a few pictures of it before, here it is again...
Bull's eye dissection!!! :PSpring is here!

Hope you enjoyed the pictures. have a good day :)

stupidity

Thinking about things i shouldnt be spending too much time thinking about.
Angry at myself, regretting something... and wishing for something, but i think that something else might be going on and its not fair. I hope my brain is just being too active. je dois parler avec quel q'un!! ah... my french is going.

for the moment- think CHEM. nothing else. if something's supposed to happen, it will happen.

Instructions to self:
1)bang head on the red stars








***







2) then wipe the computer screen clean...
3) go do something productive

Merdeka Dinner and stuff.

I think i've had enough depressing blog entries.
Saturday night was a dinner to celebrate Malaysia's 50 years of Merdeka!
For the past month we've been rehearsing for that night, so we all hoped it would go well. It wasnt brilliant, but it could have been worse. all in all, we had great fun and food was good although it reminded me of grad dinner agian where i had to grab some food, stuff some food down, then go on stage, then come back and stuff more (cold) food down my throat. But i guess it could have been worse.
Took loads of pictures. They will be on facebook SOON. im currently at uni and it wont let me upload pictures on facebook like we usually do - the entire album. i need to upload them ONE BY ONE on this computer cuz it needs upgrading. =.=

If anyone wants to see pictures immediately, I'm sure Conie has some on her blog. check out my links...

I'll post ONE picture just to be nice:

That's almost all of us (Desmond isnt there...) in our modern dance costume. Clockwise starting from me: me!:), cindy, elaine, shereen (3 sisters), conie, yin lu, margaret and center- Ram.

Since ive been spending my weekends rehearsing, and with everything that has happened in the past couple of weeks, i havent been able to concentrate much on my work. SO its about time i start catching up with my studies. I am WAY behind and i got 3 tests next week. i think i;'m only going to really prepare for ONE out of the 3. because 1 of them doesnt count, and the other one shouldnt be too difficult. Chem. agh. why am i doing pharmacy? is it too late to quit? or too early to give up?

Never really gone

Grandma passed away on the night of the 1st of September. Tomorrow's her cremation. I don't know if i want to be there for it, but whether i want to or not, i dont have a choice. I'm stuck here.
Grandma has been sick for a long time and she's always been in pain. So i guess it's a peace of mind knowing she no longer has to endure the pain, and is resting peacefully. I cannot say that I was very close to her. We never talked about anything more than the usual daily conversations about what i did, what i am doing and what i am going to do. Nonetheless, i treasure the short conversations i had with her, especially during the time i stayed at their house when i was working in kuantan, just a couple of months before i came to Adelaide. Then again, being a grandmother, she sometimes gets repetitive and it got on my nerves. During my stay in kuantan i wondered whether i would be angry at myself for feeling the way i did, when she has passed away. But i guess we all get angry and annoyed by some things, and we can't blame ourselves for it. Right? Anyway, just the thought that i did think about it makes me feel better now for how i felt then. (i dont know how much sense i am making, but i need some place to rant to make myself feel better.)
I will miss her. She always knew exactly what I liked or didnt like to eat. She gave me the jewelry that i wear everyday (i hope mum found the ring i need to get fixed). I'm extremely grateful that i was fortunate enough to be there for her birthday last year.
She is the first family member i lost (my ah-kong passed away when i was very little and i didnt remember it...). i guess i shouldn't say 'lost'. she lives in our hearts forever :)